SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS!
Wait…why are Rogues in the House reviewing a sci-fi/horror film? Well, if you've read my (Matt’s) book, To Walk on Worlds, you’d know the Alien series has been highly influential on the kind of swords-and-sorcery I write. whispers “available now”
With that out of the way, Alien Romulus has been my most anticipated viewing of the year. A new entry in my favorite film series is a rare treat, and this one looked quite promising. I expected a gorgeous practical effects powered spectacle of violence and macabre. And… I got that. I also got a well-paced, deliciously sounding, well-acted, gripping thriller. These are the things I anticipated Fede Alvaraz would deliver, and, yes, he did.
What I didn't expect: as a massive and lifelong fan of the franchise I'd have to plug my nose and roll my eyes at some of the most horribly executed fan service I've ever endured.
If I had never seen an Alien film prior to this one, my mind would be blown. It works. It works especially well when it's doing its own thing. The first act had me feeling dangerously optimistic. I loved the glimpses into grim life on a colony where the theme of corporate corruption was shown in all its soul crushing treachery. The two main characters also shone in the first act – especially Andy, the Artificial Person played by David Jonsson. His performance was a highlight and something that set the film apart from what came before. I just wish there was more. Fede Alvaraz has proven himself to either have too few storytelling ideas of his own, or to be too scared to use them.
Alvarez can shoot a scene like nobody's business. There are moments of toe-curling horror throughout and everything looks and sounds exceptional. I was so so into it until the tethers of past films tightened and suffocated the storytelling for this long-term fan. I absolutely hated and resent the use of CGI Ian Holm for Ash–I mean “Rook” and his egregious info-dump. I want this practice to stop. Right now. Never again. Thanks. This film didn't need a narrative link to the first film. In fact, if they just pulled an Alien fossil from space and didn't tell us where it came from, that might have setup a good kind of mystery. That said, the inclusion of an Ash synthetic even worked from a storytelling point of view, but the execution was poor – and that's remarkable in a film that's so well executed otherwise.
The beats and pacing are a masterclass. And of course they are, as they're directly clipped from two masterpieces. Seriously. If you're a fan of the first two films, by the time the second act develops, you will know precisely how the rest of the movie will go. However, the “final boss” was a bit of a surprise and actually kind of cool. Several audience members gasped when it first appeared. As a (sort of) fan of Prometheus, I was mostly on board. But then I considered this creation for what it was, a lazy blend of past elements that encapsulates everything wrong with this film's approach to the material. I hope my view on this softens over time.
Finally, I'm going to say this last part nice and loud for the suits sitting at the back: when I'm able to utter a line, seconds before a character says it, in a movie I've never seen, it's not a good thing. It's bad. It's a gut punch. It's fumbling the ball on a crucial play. I rarely nerd rage these days, but those kind of winking callbacks devastate me.
This film gets two ratings from me. If I can separate my franchise fanaticism from the final product I can give this movie an 8 or a 9. It's really good, and would have been a genre masterpiece if they didn't let fan service or creative cowardice take the wheel. Casual fans and newcomers will probably love this. As a die hard, though, the derivative elements of this film bust it down to a 6. I need to see it again. I want to see it again. As a fan, I'll watch this film twenty or more times before the day I die. I will reach the point where I'll be able to ignore the things I don't like and appreciate its novel moments and fine qualities. But friends, my first viewing was rough and that makes me incredibly sad.
Noah Hawley, ball's in your court. And if you lean into callbacks and fan service like Alvarez did and that ball ends up with Ripley playing a pickup game alongside a horny Ron Perlman, I'm going to blast you out of the god-damned airlock.
If you know you know, and sometimes, as Romulus proves, it's better not to know.
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